In my four years working as an esthetician I have met men and women from all walks of life. Each person coming in to the salon hoping to feel better when they leave. Throughout my many conversations with clients one hot topic tends to surface consistently. Aging. My clients all seem to share the common dread of getting older. From 22 year olds to 65 and beyond clients come in and express their personal self esteem struggles as they age.

“I wish you could take away my wrinkles” They point at their fine lines and ask if there is any is any hope. Their voices are filled with desperation. I can feel their hearts sinking as they point to their trouble areas. My usual response is to remind them that they look great and that we see ourselves under the strongest of microscopes. As an esthetician of course I offer the best solutions possible for improvement, but I know that although I can improve the health of their skin that there is no magic cure for simply getting older.

When did aging become a dirty word? In our beauty-obsessed culture, aging has become stigmatized, especially for women. As we start to show signs of aging we feel that we are slowly becoming invisible in society. People aren’t as nice to us if we aren’t young and perfect therefore we feel that opportunities will close or that we will be looked down on in some way. With the new feminist movements we are slowly paving the way women (and men) to learn to love themselves for who they are, but for most it’s still not enough. We are regularly bombarded through social media with young gorgeous 20 somethings with perfect skin, bodies and lives.

Being young and in good health is great, but when getting closer to 26 comes with anxiety and fear then we need to change our values. Media has primarily displayed the image of the flawless woman who is youthful and plump in all of the right places. What this tells women is that there is no place for older women or any woman really that falls outside of these expectations.

As an esthetician I believe that our primary focus in regards to aging and beauty should be health rather than youth. In many cultures an older woman is respected and regarded for her wisdom and leadership. There is beauty in growing older and if we can in media glorify that type of beauty as much as we do youth and sex appeal then we can increase the self esteem of our women and even men. People may even opt to forgo dangerous cosmetic procedures instead learning to love their changing appearance as a reflection of their lives stories and in doing so learn to age confidently, healthfully and of course unapologetically.